Blurb

So I realize I’ve been saying this for a while now, but book one of “Shards” really is, finally, entering its final development phase. At this point I’m not only editing, I’m also doing some layout work. I haven’t started looking for cover art yet, but I did pull a bit of dialog to serve as the blurb on the inside front cover:

“So what kind of character do you want?” Mercy asked.

“I don’t know.” Bernard inspected the options. “What’s a rogue?”

“A rogue is like a thief.”

“What, you mean they go around robbing people?”

“Well, sort of, but not like a mugger. More like, you know, Robin Hood or Ali Baba.”

“Mmm. What are you?”

“I’m an elf sorceress.”

“Of course you are. I’ll be a human rogue. Male. Good.”

“Good? You can’t be good.”

“Why not?”

“You’re a rogue.”

“So?”

“So you’re a thief. You burglarize castles. You waylay people and take their stuff. Does that sound like good behavior to you?”

“You just said rogues weren’t muggers.”

“It doesn’t take any skill to be a mugger. All it takes is a weapon. Rogues are like, like, like gymnasts. Acrobats who steal. Cat burglars. They jump around, they run along tightropes, they climb up walls.” She had no idea if this particular game actually presented rogues that way, but she was getting a little impatient. “Trust me, you’ll love being a rogue.”

“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe I should be a scout. What would a scout do?”

“Help old ladies across the street. Oh, come on. Live dangerously.” Before he could protest further, she had made him a neutral male rogue. The computer then prompted her for the character’s name.

She gave Bernard a sidelong glance.

“Can’t I just call him Bernard?” he said. “Maybe humans in that world just have regular names.”

“Regular names are boring. Ambrosia the Sorceress is not going to pal around with someone named Bernard.”

“Well, I can’t think of a name,” he said, sounding cross.

“Fine, I’ll make one up for you.” She typed Brannoc and accepted the character; the screen went black for a moment, then returned to Ambrosia standing alone and motionless in the forest, as if she’d started down the path and then forgotten where she wanted to go.

“Where’s my character?” Bernard asked.

“He’s probably sitting around somewhere complaining about his name and wondering if he should have become a scout,” Mercy said.

None of my other books has used just dialog as a blurb, but I thought this was a good paragraph for establishing the personalities of and dynamic between my two main characters. Will it make anyone want to read the book? We’ll see …

Happy New Year! And Yes I’m Still Here!

And yes, Shards (AKA “Big Book”) is still on its way. I recently switched from Pages to Scrivener to help manage it. As Peter O’Toole said in “Creator”:

Attack of the Kindle Cases: Part Four

So after using the Kindle case with the built in light, the New Yorker case, and the Dragon Stones case, I decided that what I really wanted was a flip case.  Maybe one that had some storage pockets.  Maybe one like this, from RooCase:

Netflix & Qwikster Explain Themselves …

Attack of the Kindle Cases: Part 3

After using the New Yorker Kindle case for a while, I noticed that M-Edge had started advertising that soon you would be able to create custom covers using your own pictures and photographs. Hmm, what would make a good Kindle cover for me? Hmm …

Attack of the Kindle Cases: Part Deux

So after using my orange Kindle case for a while, I happened to notice that M-Edge made Kindle cases printed with covers from The New Yorker. The New Yorker is, of course, my favorite magazine of all time (I practically have a lifetime subscription), and I love dogs, and (as the Necromancer astutely noted) orange is my favorite color. So this would be the perfect Kindle case for me, right?

Attack of the Kindle Cases

I don’t just write Kindle books, I read them too. Which of course means that I have to keep my Kindle in a case, because I’m not about to carry around a skinny $180 piece of plastic without protecting it. So, one Kindle means one case, right?

Wrong.

Evolution

Yes, I’m still here! I’ve been reworking my fantasy novel Shards, AKA “The Big Book”, since mid-December. At this point I should have Part One available within a few months, to be followed (in another ten or twelve months, based on how long it has taken me to rework Part One and on the fact that Part Two is longer).

Why is it taking me so long to finish editing Shards Part One, you ask? Well, I finished Shards quite a while ago (“quite a while” being at least a decade) and when I finally went back to edit it … well, when you go back and read something that you wrote that long ago, what immediately strikes you is that it’s terrible. That’s what happens to me, anyway.

The (Semi) Early Years: Jim Used To Be Bendy

From the “I Can’t Do That Anymore” Department:

If only my plots were this twisty.

One

This is a “Sorry I Haven’t Been Around Much” post … or rather, I have been around, but I haven’t been here. I’m still trying to get my next fantasy novel out before they forget about me over in the UK. Why, after spending over three years doing mostly funny Dennis stories instead of fiction, am I suddenly so motivated to finish my book? Because of this: